Recently, people’s number one question about Eloise, besides
if she is a he, has been what new things she’s doing. I struggle to answer that
because she’s not really doing anything
new. She doesn’t crawl, she still likes any food I put in front of her, she
still loves her dog, and she still smiles at every person she sees.
When I think about that question…what new things is she
doing…there is something that comes to mind. It’s not something I ever say out
loud to people because it feels like it wouldn’t make any sense. Eloise’s
newest thing is that she’s teaching me. She’s teaching me what joy really looks
like.
True, honest joy.
 |
| Always cheesin. |
The other day I was trying to get her to crawl because the
pressure of the internet says that my eight month old should definitely be
crawling by now, or at least be interested in it. So, I put her on her tummy
and got down next to her. I’m showing her what crawling looks like, laying in
front of her making all of my best faces, shaking her toys in front of her.
Nothing worked. She flashed her giant, cheesy smile at me and then rolled over
to her back. She didn’t start screaming after that. No. Instead, she started
laughing at her hands. She was deep belly laughing at her hands. She doesn’t
care about her toys or about what she’s supposed to (according to whatever Dr.
Google says) be doing. She cares that she’s happy. And she’s happy being her.
I can’t really decide what I expected parenting a little
would be, but I don’t think that I expected to have her be teaching me. I’m the
mom, she’s the child. I teach her. Isn’t that how this works? I suppose it is
to some extent. This girl is teaching me joy though. I’m learning what it means
to be happy with what I have in this moment. I’m learning that sharing a smile
can make a big difference to those around me. I’m learning that looking for the
best in situations makes me feel a lot better than finding the worst. Joy. It’s
contagious. It’s beautiful. And I wouldn’t trade the joy that radiates from
this little girl for anything. I imagine that if we all channeled a little more
Eloise in our lives, we would recognize a lot more of the beauty of life around
us. I know I have.
